Jam I've been groovin to lately

Untitled.

Patience is a virtue yes the blessed anatomical reunion this fusion that I fantasize about more than you know will happen but let’s take it nice and slow and just ride the tidal waves of these sunny days when our bodies give heat to one another and to our amazement we don’t play each other as the past attempts to invade I’d like to get to know you baby and open up to you my rivers of honey let you dip into my sweetness revel in my chocolate thickness and even rest for a while but know this it is only if you stick around for the ride and if you put your hands on my hips you can even taste the future on my lips and see the moon in my eyes. Yeah I read the expression in your face looking ghostly familiar but I’m still trying to feel yuh touchin on your midnight skin set with star lit eyes I’m only staring at your lips when you smile imagining our bodies brown and black intertwined like vines. climbin to the sky, climbin oh so high.

Brotha this chemistry is simple, all you gotta be is be mine.

The Creative Life Flow

Hey All,

it's been a while! I've been kind of busy with school work and other academic pursuits but I'm back with a new topic to discuss ....that being the creative life flow. What I mean is, the force in the human spirit that encourages creativity, expression and a general desire to communicate one's feelings/soul/journey. I'm writing about this now, not because this is something that is new for me to think about, but because of a conversation I had with a young artist and his poet friend the other evening.

What is it in us that directs our creative energy? Why is that we pick one route to express ourselves, and neglect others, even though we may have a talent in it? Why does that energy seem to completely dissipate at some points, and come back like with the wild rage of a hungry lion? Let's analyze these questions.

In my experience, creative energy for me is something that compels me into creative action. For example, a restlessness, a yearning for something that may result in poetry, singing, painting, playing an intrument, sewing acting etc. Some people (like myself) have a basic level of skill in these different creative mediums, while others may have a particular thing that they enjoy and are good at. The young artist that I spoke to had two talents: painting, and poetry. He told me that he hadnt done any poetry in a couple years basically because he wanted to direct all of his creative life force at his paintings. This raises an interesting question: Do we have the agency to compel our creativity into whatever medium we choose? Or is better that we just let our creative flow lead us into whatever direction we should be in? In my life, I follow the latter. Sometimes, I'll be compelled to create a poem, other times a song, other times a painting. I never know what I'm going to do in advance, it just kind of happens that way, my spirit just knows what it needs. Is it possible for a person to just pick what they want to do and compel all their creative energy in that direction (and actually excel in their chosen art form)?

The next question is one of the "creative dry spells". This is something every artist of every media I know has experienced. In Clarissa Pinkole Estes' book, Women Who Run With the Wolves (absolutely amazing, go buy it!) she talks about this phenomena, not necessarily in terms of "creativity" per se, but she addresses the times that we go through struggle for what seems no reason. On page 452 she says, "...the Self, or in our parlance, the Wild Woman, seeds the psyche with perils and challenges in order that the human in despair drives herself back down into her original nature looking for answers and strength, thereby reuniting with the great wild Self and, as much as possible thereafter, moving as one." I thought this was such an important passage, and it really relates to the creative life flow. Creativity is like a stream, bubbling a lively in summer, and completely frozen during winter only to begin its flow again in spring.

The point is, think about all of these questions, and how they pertain to you. Think of instances in your life where you may have encountered the "loss" of creativity, and then experienced the overpowering "return". Think of the time when you believe you lost your creative spirit. Think of ways to find it and nurture it again.

Peace.

This is the Real.

Hello Everyone

It's been a quite a turbulent week and I am glad that I now have a chance to reflect on it all. I have experienced great pain, and sometimes I still struggle with the reality of the loss... A young girl I knew died of cancer on monday. I had just went to visit her the day before, and I saw the pain, saw the complete difference between who I knew, and what the cancer had done to her body (but not her spirit). I was already shook when I went to go see because although I have had quite a few people in my life die of cancer (including my grandfather, cousin and neighbor), I had never actually seen someone dying. I had never seen a YOUNG person dying.

I am thankful that she is no longer suffering, but the fact that she no longer exists (existence preceeds essence) was hard to accept. I do now (although I go through random bouts of sadness), and I find comfort in the fact she lives in my heart, and all beautiful songs. She was a singer, and one of the most talented ones I have ever known. She will live on in all my songs. The fragility of life, the percieved injustice of the Universe. They say there is always a reason, so I must believe that there is in order to accept this. My heart goes out to her family and close friends.

But moving beyond this tremendous loss, I have many questions, potential insights. Sometimes, we may question how real everything is. Is this "reality" just a figment of our horrible imaginations, or can such a violent, wonderous, perplexing place really exist?

It does.

It is so real, that sometimes it can be overwhelming, suffocating and immensly frightening. But this is it. The beautiful thing about this existence is that it is fluid. We have the power to make it into something that is unbearable: we take the lives of others, take our own lives or create painful memories for others. Or we can make it something so beautiful, so positive, exhilirating and fulfilling that when the end comes, there will be no sad eulogies of half lives and unrealized dreams.

We are here. This is now. This is the Real.


Peace.

Spokenword.

Poem I wrote today.

Unconditional Love.

My heart

Is like an ocean

Crashing

Over and over again on

The shores of

my consciousness

The shores of

my words

they gently pull the sand inwards

towards it’s center it’s

beating, thrusting heart it’s

overwhelming calm it’s

overbearing exciting its totally

uninvited anxiety anger happiness peace love hate

forgiveness.

The ocean in my heart

It spills over through my mouth

Over the lips the rim and

Everything that I

Think, feel

Wish I could say, dare to say…

Sometimes it even leaks from between my legs

Rushing out into the world,

Overwhelming all and everything with this

Oceanic love this

Vast unending

Deep sea blue

Crystallized

Snow-like, soft

Warm, sunlight.

Oshun gave me this heart

Oshun gave me this heart so I can beat

Give my love to the world, beat

With everything for this world.

My oceanic heart.

It beats for the love that I gave

The love that was never returned

It beats for the hands I never held and for

The lips I never kissed the

Soft skin I’ve never touched

The gentle eyes that I never saw…

It beats for the hearts that go unknown

It beats for

The wild flowers being grown

It beats for

The babies of Mother Earth

It beats for

The sun goddess giving us her warmth

It beats for

Us all it

It beats for us all brotha it

It beats for us all it

It beats for us all sista it

It beats!

It beats.

Thank you, mother.

"Time to save the world, where in the world is all the time?"

Hello folks!

I’ve been pretty busy lately and that being so, it’s been difficult gathering my thoughts intelligibly enough to even consider writing a blog; but I think I’m just about ready.

So the dominant question (being that there are many) that’s been floating around in my head: How do you manage time. That is, how do you manage your time in a way that you can still nurture yourself, while fulfilling all the obligations and duties you have to the outside world? Can someone living in a fast paced urban environment even consider this a possibility? Many would argue on both sides of the fence, and both, at some points, would be right.

Finding the balance between inner peace/health and outward sustenance is absolutely crucial to the success and health of all individuals. The common issue with this though, is how to find ways for nurturing the soul self. Not everyone is an artist (meaning all media) and not everyone has some cute little hobby that gives them joy (like collecting stamps). Yup. Stuck in a bind. But lo and behold, there ARE other ways to find that much needed channel for inner peace. It’s called meditation.

Now when I say meditation I don’t mean you have to pull some yoga guru business and sign up for the next class. Meditation simply means taking time out to still your Self. To give your mind, body, soul a moment to relax and take in the calm.

med·i·ta·tion (noun) [med-i-tey-shuh n]:

the emptying of the mind of thoughts, or the concentration of the mind on one thing, in order to aid mental or spiritual development, contemplation, or relaxation

Meditating can be as simple as finding a quiet space, closing your eyes, breathing slowly and just listening to the sound of silence… or putting on some relaxing music and reading a book, cooking your favorite meal, sitting in a comfy chair and reviewing all your thoughts without emotional attachment (this definitely takes practice... yoga anyone?!), or just doing something peaceful that instills you with a sense of wellbeing or better perspective. For me, it’s a variety of things. I write poetry, sing, paint, listen to music, do yoga, read other peoples’ poetry, drink herbal teas while doing all things listed ((I LOVE chamomile)) and even taking care of my locs has become a form of meditation! (This is something that I learned from another woman’s beautiful holistic health/beauty/creativity blog. Check it out here: http://www.holisticlocs.com/ )

Case in point folks: take time, no matter if it’s 10 minutes or 3 hours, to nurture your soul self. You will feel your vitality being restored, even if it’s just a tad more energy or making a stressful day a little more bearable. It’s a benefit and principle of yoga to meditate for a reason. When you have mastered the ability to control your mind, to calm it at your will, you have greater ability and success in objective thinking, establishing calm in tumulus situations, and maintaining peaceful relationships with others.

Questions to ponder…

What do you enjoy that is constructive?

What brings you joy in most of your days?

How can this be utilized in nurturing your soul Self?

Peace.